Monday, September 15, 2008

Stay connected !

In this maddening world of 21st century, where human relations are measured by money, power and influence, I truly feel that staying connected with family and friends helps an individual make a better person.

Family values are both best explored and exploited in the Indian society. I didn't mean to be a racist here, but being the typical Indian I was raised as, I couldn't help but remark about it in this way .

I was the older of the two kids in my family. My younger brother was my first best-friend i've ever had, and continue to remain even now. Though there isn't much of an age-gap between us, I was always this bossy elder sister whom my brother used to look up in awe (It might have been fear or hatred too, but he was too intimidated to say that maybe..hehe ). I have a truckload of cousins too - both maternal and paternal . The times we had, the fun we shared, the festivals together, the tragic moments binding us... all have been so good to remind ourselves of the blissful life we had as kids.

Childhood has always been great fun for me and my bro with our cousins. My first cousins and we shared a great rapport amongst us. Always playing pranks on each other and especially on my dad .... have been great experiences. India, being known as a "Land of festivals", we always had major excitement whenever a festival approached us. It actually meant a holiday, new clothes, delicious delicacies and the binding among our relatives. Now, as we celebrate our own festivals without mom and dad and some thousands of miles away from India, we do realise the important of being actually together .

I remember a tragic incident in our family, when my dad's elder brother passed away in a train accident in 1995. It was a major shock to our family, and the very roots of our family just shook terribly. The worst hit was to my grandmother, who at the vulnerable age of 70 had lost her own son. It was a terrible time for our entire family. I remember my late uncle's kids still being in school and the turmoil my aunt faced during that horrible phase. The wound is still fresh in everyone's minds, but time dissolved and solved most of it. Now, my cousins have their own lives and my aunt is doing well too, with her job. Though nothing can get my uncle back into this world, the only lesson we were taught was the importance of "human relations" and its possible only until we are alive in this world. It just doesn't make sense to fight insensibly for minor issues, because life is too short for all the unending and unnerving squabbles among our own family members. The unfortunate incident was anyway destined, but it just remained a reminder for us to lead better lives with one another .

As we grew, my cousins, each one of them have their own individual lives ... most of them either married or engaged - busy with their own partners and kids. It's only when we watch the old pictures we do realize how fast time actually flew and how little bonding is actually left now. Despite being terribly busy in our own lives, I should thank the internet, which has helped us be in touch with one another despite being in various time zones and places too.

Presently living in the USA, where life just seems to be a whirlwind of activities, and days seem to divide themselves into busy weekdays and even-busier weekends, I sometimes ponder over the lack of warmth exuding among our own friends and relatives, due to the lack of time. Life in USA is nothing but a "rat-race" of who is being more successful than whom. That's what atleast I thought of until I was residing in Asia. But luckily, as I complete almost a year of residentship of America, I realise that the NRI's here are more positively adamant on preserving our Indian heritage and culture than the actual indians residing in India. It might be just because of staying in an ultra-modern country, the DESIS here tend to get a strange feeling of belonging to neither cultures. In an attempt to bridge the gap, most of the desi kids seem to imbibe the Indian culture through classical music or dance. It seems a little funny when the kids are actually speaking in the typical American accent, while also slowly mastering the Hindustani music. It just reflects on how strong we feel for our country, despite being eons away from India. That's one way of being connected too .

As a parent, I would love my kids to be brought up in a similar way, not tending to forget our actual roots, but also trying to fit in this global modern world .

I just say one thing to all the people who are trying to give an excuse of being "busy" in their lives. It just doesn't take more than a few minutes to wish ur dear ones on their special days. The other days might be their usual routine, but it really makes a huge difference to wish a dear friend or a relative on their special day. You do that this year, and you will never complain that no one wished you for your birthday next year. Its just a matter of reciprocation . Try it !!

4 comments:

Manjusha said...

This post serves as a wonderful awakening!!!

Anonymous said...

Hi Shanthi Prasad,

I am here again... may be I am the right guy to comment about this post because, I lived like a spartan right through. I missed my family ever since I was 9 and I continue to miss them today too...

You are very right. We donot become conscious about what we miss till we miss them. I can relate to your post. All of us (immediate siblings) live in different countries and we miss each other. We make conscious efforts to "Stay connected".

Like the other reader commented, it is an eye opener for those who want to open their eyes.

Shanthiprasadh said...

hi ram, thanks again for liking this post... it was just a piece of my mind, and am really glad u could connect to it !

Rika said...

very true..life is all about the give-n-take relationship we hv with everyone around us...we should learn to care for others thinking that if we don't who else would...